End of May

I have to fit in one entry before May ends. This month I got to do several fun things that I will always remember. First I discovered an indoor skydiving place a few months ago and got Anissa and Mom a gift to go and try it out for mothers day (mom) and birthday (Anissa). They both loved it and you can see the video on the family blog. A few weeks later for my birthday they returned the gift to Noah and I so we got to go do it too. It was so fun I cant wait to do it again! I placed a small video clip of my experience on the family blog as well.

The next big thing I got to do this month was go to my 10 year high school reunion in Guadalajara! I loved it. It was amazing to go back with Noah and spend time with out friends and eat at the places we loved when we were living there. I will try to hunt down pictures and place them here later.

In my professional life I got accepted as the Central district Spanish rover. That means instead of having a beat and patrolling, I will be only responding to Spanish calls and assisting officers that are already on Spanish calls. I get a pay increase and will enjoy great benefits such as taking vacation days without being subject to normal minimum staffing requirements and such.

Toward the end of the month I decided to clean up the garage and make a shade for some of the pool equipment outside. I also cleaned up the back yard and got it prepared for the summer. As I cleaned I discovered a wet suit that I bought a long time ago. Since our pool has been a bit to cold for my liking I decided to put it on and jump in that very night. I was so fun and I have gone swimming with the girls every day since the discoverey (Ok only two days since I discovered it but it sounds better this way).

Today is Saturday May 31st and we are all going to a Police Family appreciation day. This will be at the training center and we are going in a few hours. The kids are excited and the Wettsteins are coming too. There will be some awesome things for Kalvin to brag about there! (SWAT training, Helicopter, etc...)

Noah and my parents are in London and I have spoken to them a few times. They are loving it and I cant wait for them to get back so we can see pictures and hear all about it. I am currently in week 4 of my roots of terrorism class and so far its going well. Its been a challenge dedicating the amount of time I need to but I guess I just have to do what it takes! Well this is my entry. I will try to do better next month.

Mum..

Landon just started saying "mum" the other day and Anissa is so happy he is finally saying mum... He started saying "dada" a few weeks ago so I guess I am just his favorite person since I pretty much do everything for him anyway!! (thats sarcasm for you who dont know me). We recently got Landon's 7 month pictures and he is so cute. He can sit up on his own now and is getting bigger every day.

Olivia is addicted to Sleeping Beauty and Cinderella right now and is watching Sleeping Beauty as I type this. She watched Cinderella just before it... ha. She's so cute and fun as always.

Noah got back from a trip to Utah today and is still staying with us. He is doing well with his helicopter training and cant wait for the day his little wifey Giselle catches up to him. It must be so hard for them to be living separated these few months.

Anissa and I are excited for our triathlon coming up in 4 weeks. We already paid for the hotel where we will be staying and its all falling in together just fine. Its exciting that we are going to get to participate in the triathlon as well as have a family vacation!

Robyn is doing well in school and is growing up so fast. One day I'm sure we will look back and wish we could keep all the kids as small as they are today! She is becoming more athletic and recently won 6 first place ribbons in her school track and field day.

Work is going well for me. Yesterday I responded to an overdose victim who passed away naked on her bed. She seemed to have lived a hard life toward the end so maybe it was good that she just moved on? Its interesting to see and have witnessed now how primal and brutal both birth and death can be. It helps me see the sanctity of the spirit over the physical body. Once the spirit leaves the body it really is just flesh and bones... meat like any other... crazy!

I am in week 6 of my research methods class and its a bit more difficult than I expected. I guess that helps me feel challenged and rewarded by successfully completing each week. As of right now I am a week behind and hope to catch up this week by visiting the library for a few hours! Thats all for now folks...

03/22/08

March is almost over and time is flying!!! Today is Saturday and Noah has been living with us for 2 weeks now. Its so fun to have him here and to be able to go places with him or just hang out at home. Yesterday we both rode our bikes for 10 miles and then ran for 3 miles in 1 hour and 4 minutes. We are still training for the Rocky Point triathlon in Mexico in May and so far I think we are doing pretty good. Papi, Dak and Anissa are training as well and we all keep tabs of our progress in the training.

I am in week 3 of my Research Methods class and it as been stressful at times. Yesterday I had to go to the library for 2 hours and get away from all distractions to get my work done for the week. At this time I am also listening to "Pillars of the Earth" by Ken Follett on audio book when I run and exercise. I am so glad to live in this day and in this land! The book is about life in England during the 1500's... and wow it was harsh for most.

Olivia is getting over a fever yesterday and now has a cough. Landon is being loud and cute and now uses the high chair for eating. Noah placed a cute picture of Landon on his Blog so check it out.... the post title is "My New Camera!" posted March 20.

School is in Session!

Today is my first day of school and I'm pretty excited to be starting again. I am currently enrolled in the American Military University for a graduate degree in Strategic Intelligence Studies. I hope to be able to complete my masters within the next two years. I dont quite know where this will take me but I know it will be useful for what I currently do and what I think I want to do.... (Foreign Affairs with the State Department)

I didnt go to work today as I feel sick and had a fever and flu like symptoms so I had the chance to read a lot of information about my program and how things work within the program. I am excited and a bit scared to be back into the academic world and have to write papers and research and cite and document things etc... I think this will be good for me though as I tend to become idol when I have extra time.

Today Olivia had her first play date with a neighbor friend named Eli West. Eli is 4 yrs old and Olivia is almost 3. It was so cute to see her all proud following him around and copying what he did etc... She loves to copy Robyn too and it makes her feel so big and important. I am very happy with my kids and feel blessed for each one of them in my life. All three of them are so cute in their own ways and I love being home and spending time with them. Recently I have enjoyed taking Robyn and Olivia to the park and climbing trees with them. Olivia and I ride Robyn's green scooter and sometimes I ride the scooter and pull Robyn and Olivia on a radioflyer wagon. I love it! Nothing compares to just playing and spending time with them. I cant wait for Landon to grow up a bit more and stop slobbering everywhere and be able to join us.

Anissa is sleeping next to me on the couch as I sit here on my beloved Mac typing away and doing school work. Anissa truly is the glue that holds this house together and I love her so much for that. She looks so cute and beautiful to me and the last few days I have noticed more than ever that she really is just perfect in every way for me. As she sleeps next to me while I type I cant help but think that I am the luckiest man in the world to even dream of living my life with her forever. Here is a picture of what I am looking at right now... she fell asleep reading scriptures....

February 2008

Once again I am proving to be very bad and inconsistent with updating my journal. Today is the 25th and February is almost over. Next week I will be starting my Master's with the American Military University. I plan on completing the Master of Intelligence Studies so I can add on to the experience I had with the army. Even if this doesn't lead to my next career choice I think I will enjoy the program. I also plan on completing the program within two years and then most likely start teaching online courses within the law enforcement or military oriented programs out there. The University of Phoenix will most likely by my first choice to teach from as I have connections there and I know they pay well. It will be a way to supplement my income as I continue to work for Mesa Police.

Another huge thin happening right now has to do with Noah and Giselle. Noah's flight school (Silver State) just declared bankruptcy and suddenly closed. Now Noah is going to be moving here to Mesa to live with Anissa and I for 3 months while he starts a new flight school. After 3 months Giselle will finish her schooling in Utah and come down and catch up to Noah. Meanwhile I guess they will find a place to live and will be here for about a year or so! I am so excited to finally live around Noah again. I am constantly thinking of all the things I will get to do with him here. He gets here in a few weeks (middle of March).

Anissa and I (and Noah and Dak and Dad) are preparing for a sprint marathon in early May in Mexico. We have all been running and training and we are pretty excited to see how it goes. Anissa and I have gym memberships and have been consistently using them. Robyn recently had a piano recital and also had the infamous "big talk" about the birds and the bees. She is so smart and mature and it went really well. My favorite quote of the night will be "Now I really don't want to grow up."

As of right now I am working the S-6 shift which means I work Sat through Tuesday from 3:00 pm to 1:00 am. I actually like this schedule the most so far as it gives me the feeling of having the weekend still and allows me to go to church in the morning. I enjoy all the guys I work with and my sergeant is really cool too. I have been riding as a two man unit for most of the last few weeks and I almost always ride with Ed Farrugia. Its been fun and it makes the shift go by faster most of the time. I also enjoy learning and trying to pick up certain traits and methods used by other officers so its been overall a great experience.

Well I'll get around to typing more next week I'm sure. (yeah right...)

January Update

Time to update some of my new plans and recent changes. First of all I was finally able to bid for my first shift using my seniority with the police. As of yesterday I now work from 3 in the afternoon to 1 in the morning with Wednesday, Thursday and Friday off and half of Saturday. So its not bad and it allows me to still go to church on Sunday's. I work in the same district (Central) and i was able to keep the same beat (35) so I only have to adjust to the new time.

I recently adjusted my degree program to the Masters in Intelligence Studies program... hopefully I will get started in February... Noah and I have been able to discuss some future career aspirations and I am excited to see if we can truly make the plans come to pass. With new years we are all fresh and excited with new years resolutions and part of that is going to school for me and getting all the training I can with the police. We (Anissa and I) are also contemplating joining a gym so we can get in better shape. This Christmas Dak and Tara gave all of us iPod nano's and Noah gave me an iPod Nike to measure my running. I am excited to use it for my physical goals this year. I plan to get in shape and stay in shape to try to get picked up with the SWAT team here. I think that would be a pretty cool experience.

Kids are all good and fun. Landon is starting to teeth so he gets a bit grumpy at times and Olivia is just simply Olivia.... Robyn got an electric scooter and is growing up so fast. Well there is my quick overview life for now... more to come later.

Will I live through the day

June 15, 2003 started like all the other days I had spend in the Kuwaiti desert thus far. I was part of the 142 Military Intelligence Battalion and had been in one of the most northern camps in Kuwait for 2 months just waiting for a mission to take us across the border into Iraq. My Battalion was supposed to be in Turkey waiting to go south in to Iraq during the invasion but due to political pressure Turkey never allowed us to create a northern front. So hear I was in Kuwait without a mission and without a plan for what turned out to be 4 months.

The group I was with was part of the Utah National Guard and therefore had many latter day saints who were also retuned missionaries. Today was Sunday and we were congregated in a large tent for church services. I looked around and thought to my self “Not everyone can say they have been to church with a gun on their side.” After church I went back to my tent and started the monotonous routine of nothing to do all over again. After a few hours however one of our officers came by and stated he had found a mission for us to do, at least temporarily.

I reported to the officers’ tent and was informed that as of tomorrow morning we were going to start manning one of the security checkpoints into the camp. This meant that a group of soldiers would be selected each shift from all over the camp, and together would be responsible for checking vehicles coming into the base. “Oh Great” I thought to myself, we were not trained for such a task and every day we heard about car bombs going off and killing soldiers at these so called checkpoints.

To make matters worse I was told I would be the non-commissioned officer in charge of my group since I was the only sergeant of the group I was assigned to. So here we were about to carry out a task that none of us have been trained to do and the person in charge of making sure all goes well is me. I was scared and immediately started to say a prayer in my heart.

Through out the rest of the day I prayed frequently to overcome this feeling of great fear that began to swell inside of me. I kept thinking to myself that all would be ok and that I was only feeling scared because this was something I have never done. I prayed to have the Lord bring a feeling of peace to my soul and to assure me that it would be ok. As the day went on I began to feel more and more anxious that this answer to prayer was not coming.

At night I intensified my prayers and though about my family and future and dreams I wanted to carry out. I thought to myself, “this cant be I surely will not be harmed or die yet, the Lord will not allow it; I am not ready!” All night I agonized and cried out for a confirmation of peace, just a simple feeling of “it will be ok”. To my great surprise I did not get that feeling and I finally began to understand that maybe it was meant to be and just maybe, this was my time to end mortality.

I pondered that thought for a few hours and thought about what it would be like for my family to learn that I was killed in a car bomb explosion. I tried to imagine what my funeral would be like with military honors and all. I thought my mom would be a bit angry receiving an American flag as if that can replace her son and then I wondered if they would eventually be ok with my death being at the service of my country. I thought about my twin brother and wondered what life without me would be like for him. The bond between twins is very strong and my brother and I are among the strongest bond there can probably be. I wondered if he would feel the moment of my death even though we were separated by thousands of miles.

Finally morning came and I realized I had not slept all night. I had made it through the darkest hours and began to feel that maybe the sun would lift my spirits. I got up just before the sun rose and completed my preparation. I walked out of my tent and had about a half mile walk through the desert to reach the southern most entrance to the camp where I would be in charge of security for the next 10 hours. As I walked I prayed again hoping for one last chance to get a feeling of peace and confirmation that all would be ok. As I arrived at the check point I thought to my self “you know; its not that bad, I have lived a good life and I have loved everyone I have ever met. If today is my day to die, then let me die and meet my maker in high spirits.” At this very thought I had a sudden profound feeling come over me that at this very point in my life things were ok and, if I did die I would not stand ashamed in front of my Savior.

It was like having a very real lifting of weight off my shoulders and all of a sudden I began to cry. I got my answer; a warm feeling of peace came over me and I could almost hear a small whisper saying, “It will be ok.” I realized that the answer to my prayer was not “You will be safe”, it was “If anything happens today, if today is the day you die, its all ok.” So there I stood, alone in the desert, not far from the very place prophets of old had once stood and I experienced a very real and very profound personal revelation. The Lord had finally opened my mind and helped me understand that he did not promise me safety from being harmed or even killed in the next 10 hours but he did promise me that if such a thing happened, it was all ok, I was in good standing with him and I could stand proud before him. That was more comforting than I could have ever imagined.

I squared my shoulders and looked at the security checkpoint and at that moment I decided I would work hard today and endeavor to serve my men and help them carry out their mission for the day with safety and care. Never had I felt so good and confident and yet so sure that most likely something bad was about to happen and I might not live through the day. Fortunately we made it through the day without incident. We did have a scary moment that required aiming our guns and yelling at a driver to get back into his vehicle, but no explosions and no harm.

Four years have past since that day and still I remember the lesson the Lord taught me. He didn’t make me confident by saying I would be safe and out of harms way, he made me confident by teaching me that one-day we will surely die and the important thing is to be ready by being worthy. Luckily that day has not come yet, but I know it will one day and when it does it doesn’t matter how it happens or what I was doing, all that matters is that I’m ready. That day in the desert, I was, and the confidence and peace that knowledge gave me, was a thousand times better than just knowing I would be safe.